DOES THE EXISTENCE OF GOD MATTER
Shantanu Panigrahi
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Whether or not a God, as Creator or Personal or both truly exists, basing my life on this possibility helped me search for the person that I should be today.
I changed my Profile Bio on Facebook and Twitter to ‘Self-defined agnostic Vishistaadvaitist’, for I do not know what Vishistaadvata Vedanta is historically. I believe it accepts that a God exists as Creator and who is omnipresent, that is all I know.
Far more important for me is to establish my own identity now that the search for the truth has come to an end. There are no proceedings outstanding. All my correspondence are complete. All my publications are complete. The Foundation that is supposed to have a global impact is set in stone in ‘The Theory of Everything and Its Usage at https://www.thenewclimateformankind.com/. There are no challenges to what I have expressed. This means that my truth-search path was exquisite. The use of what I named satya-advaita yoga has led to me reaching my aim of generating Knowledge for World Conservation. People now or in the future can make what they will of what I have done and written. There are no charges against me by the State authorities. I have received a letter this morning from the Medway Maritime Hospital for an appointment on Urology for 4 May 2022. No one has been able to justify that I have a mental disorder either. I did everything according to the law of the land and if there is an eternal law, the law of the universe.
This self-defined Vishistadvaitism is a philosophy in the end. It is a theory. I have no further avenues to proceed through to try and find out if it can be a religion. So I am an agnostic Hindu, and will remain so from this day onwards in as much self-isolation as possible. Being a theist or an atheist brings with them regulations to regulate oneself with. The mind cannot be clear. One runs out of options in argumemts that take place in human societies. Advaitism as defined in my Vishistadvaitism is being agnostic, meaning there may be God, either as Creator, or Personal or both and on the other hand there may be none of these entities in existence. I certainly as a Scientist did not find concrete proof of the existence of any kind of God, but that is a matter for the Creator, the thing that is the universe. Is it not better left to the word ‘Universe’, rather than assuming that it is to be named as God or It? - from my point of view now, of course it is.
So does God matter: for me it has been an instrument, a tool, to help me search for and find the meaning of life, the dharma that I live to in terms of duties and responsibilities. Agnosticism is non-dual. Harmoniising through truth-accommodation is ‘paramarthika dharma’ that is non-violent as it has its roots in ahimsa. For several years now I did not have a God to guide me, if I ever positively had an Awakened quest to search for the Ultimate Reality. If there is a God only He/It has the answer to that. I cannot know that beyond the speculations that I have made as part of my journey of employing satya-advaita yoga.
This is the last word in this Section of book ‘The Allurement of Reality’. I had dreams, visions, hallucinations, utterrances that were seemingly prophecies, or were they all the symptoms of paranoid schizophrenia characterised by persistent delusions. I needed to know, but how does one study the mind? Does Psychiatry provide greater or lesser clarification? Can a God reside in one’s mind to get a person to think and act in specific ways?
The best thing that I can do is to donate all my notes and writings in handwritten form to medical science as issues that need to be asked questions of. Medications (anti-psychotic, ant-depressant, mood-stabilising) had no effect on me. I carried on dealing with intrusions and injustices suffered in my own way. The two spells in mental hospitals (3 months in 2004; and 1 month in 2008) were severe blows so that I had to change course to preserve my liberty. And much as got continued harassment on a daily basis, the supersensitive person in me found just the right ways of surviving and staying out of the mental hospital or worse in a prison cell (apart from the 5 hours of detention in Police custody on 24 November 2021). Through my timely emails, texts, visits to doctors, psychiatrists and employers ,and phone calls that I made I averted all dangers to my survival while building up an Internet Information Empire of Knowledge to restore my damaged reputation that perpetrators as institutions of the State had thrown on me to isolate me out of society with their defamatory persecution. I never, in recent years especially, knew what I was writing at any given time; their significance in terms of the warfare that went on and on only became clear to me subsequently on reflection in that they were so emphatically-effective that I used to say to myself constantly that I could not take credit for the intelligence with which the emails were being drafted, and so some hidden power in my mind must have inserted those thoughts in fhere for me to act upon upons them and perfectly so in time and words. This then reinforced the idea of a personal God dwelling dormantly in my psyche.
It is important that medical science pays attention to this. I have been nonchalant, spontaneous and unpremeditated in all my actions for several years as I got weaned off the idea that I needed or ever had any such God, for I have always cherished my freedom and liberty since learning that reliance on a God could put me in a mental hospital or prison cell again. Hence today I am not taking any chances: I am agnostic and need to put a stop to interactions that can and will rebound on me given that the State has time on its hands and I am still under Police investigation. I need to now play my cards very closely to my chest for which I must keep all information out of the public domain.
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Last Updated: 13.44 pm (UK-Time) 2 March 2022